I can't tell if it's that I desire to be elsewhere, and that Milwaukee is too similar to my home in Illinois. Nor am I sure if it is in fact that I am not adequately challenged by my courses this semester. Or even if the student body, being the drinking school, and me being the antithesis of a drinker has a culture of providing 'buffer time' in which students may have sufficient time to alleviate any alcohol from their systems. Or is it even the constant image of a well-worn, mossy Ivy-League school building somewhere in Massachusetts in the back of my mind and that my sister will likely attend that school, and I may never even see such a thing. Is it envy? After all, I seem to have followed my sister, despite me being older, to a College Prep school in the city. Do I simply need to make a greater splash in the community in order to not feel so detached? Right now, I feel rather a part of the community, and maybe I need to give the school more time. Is it the cityscape Milwaukee provides that is again, too similar to my high school Chicago backdrop? Or am I overly adventurous, should there be such a thing? Do I like to be the different person, "the transfer". Do I like to meet people with difficulty? Do I like to not be ahead as I feel now? Do I feel uncomfortable when I feel "ahead" of the curve? Do I truly want to transfer again?! My intent with going to Marquette was that I was going to attend this, and no other school for four years! Should I rough it (because the social atmosphere is unrivaled) and take more challenging classes, maybe graduate early through summer classes, and take grad school at one of those historic, charming, and mossy Boston universities? Should I truly abandon my newfound friends so early by taking summer courses?
What should I do? I know for now, I will challenge to finish my assignments with yet more quality, contribute to the school newspaper, study abroad in Germany this summer, and maybe for another semester sometime down the line, join a fraternity, and achieve a higher GPA than was ever possible for me at high school what with all the commuting, sports, and excessive homework assignments.